Hello again Marvelous People!
Today we are honored to have an internationally known coach and author.
Paula's writings are amazing and insightful.
Please be sure to pass this on to the friends, neighbors, co-workers or relatives that you know are in the midst of a crisis.
Keep in touch. And be kind to yourself!
Marvin LeBlanc, LUTCF, CNP
Best Selling Author - Small Business Owner
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Crisis Times: Respond Using These 3 Timely Tips
By: Paula Eder
Crisis times come unexpectedly, by definition. How do you respond? When it’s someone else’s crisis that strikes, do you find yourself full of feelings and knocked off track?
The time challenges that a crisis presents are complex. But the good news is that a friend or family member’s crisis, while very difficult, doesn’t need to throw you totally off balance. You can respond from a centered, grounded, and warm place. But how do you get there?
Crisis Scenario
Here’s a situation to consider: Suppose a close friend of yours unexpectedly loses her job. This certainly qualifies as a crisis! She is angry, frightened and hurt emotionally. Her need for your support goes beyond the usual social contact that you both enjoy. Her crisis makes the need at once more immediate and less flexible than usual.
In response to her crisis, you are called to find time to be a good friend right now – not tomorrow or next Friday, when you might actually have free time. So, what can you do?
3 Timely Tips for Crisis Situations
1. First, it is important to be aware of your own feelings about the crisis.
You need to find time to understand how you feel about this event before you can provide support to your friend. Do you feel obligated? Do you feel pressured? Do you feel guilty thinking about how the need to support your friend will complicate your planned activities?
The more conflicted you feel, the more difficult it is to provide support for your friend in crisis.So, when a crisis hits, start finding the time to be the friend you’d like to be by clearing your mind of all sense of obligation or guilt. These don’t provide a good base for responding to the situation.
2. The next step is to be realistic about what you can do in the context of your existing commitments.
Don’t create expectations that you may not be able to meet. Scan your schedule and take a look at your priorities. Once you have considered your own feelings, you have the clarity to realign your plans and respond to your friend’s crisis from a clean, grounded place. You will then be able to balance being the friend you’d like to be with accomplishing what you need to do.
3. Your presence is what counts!
When you respond to a friend in crisis, remember that offering your undivided, unhurried attention with genuine caring always provides more support and relief than ‘sacrificing’ more extensive time while feeling distracted, resentful and over-extended. Your authentic and warm presence is a gift that helps in ways that are very meaningful and sustaining.
Crisis times are always going to be disturbing and disruptive. But, to the extent that you can find time to connect with yourself and stay grounded, you will be able to respond rather than react to what is happening. This is very helpful energy to bring to a crisis, or to any challenging situation.
Paula Eder, PhD is an internationally-known coach and published author who specializes in mentoring heart-based entrepreneurs and small business owners, from the inside out, to align their core values and energy with their time choices and behaviors so that they make more money, create more freedom, and find more time. To learn more about Paula’s unique, Heart-Based Time Management™ System and begin your transformational journey, sign up for her Finding Time Success Kit . Discover how you can find time for what matters most.
